Monkey Business

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Earlier this month Animal Planet debuted a new series called Fatal Attractions. The topic of the show? Stupid people who think wild animals are pets. Not squirrels and raccoons. Lions. And Tigers. And too avoid any further cliches, bat shit crazy chimpanzees that leave you without a face.(That link is probably a little graphic.) Read more for my review of the show, and the stupidity of the individuals involved.


When I first saw commercials for this show, I knew that it was going to be good. There was no way that I was going to pass up this opportunity to see people doing stupid stuff with dangerous animals. (Animal Planet should have named this show Bad Judgement Hour.) I don't mean to make fun or belittle the suffering of these people, I'm writing to point out their ridiculous stupidity.

The first episode was about reptiles. The second episode was about Big Cats, and the third and most recent episode so far was about Chimpanzees. I only watched part of the reptile episode because it was kind of boring, but there was a man who had an obsession with lizards. And he had a good nine or 10 of them roaming his house. One day he stopped coming to work, and this is how they found him:

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(Drawn by Da Vinci himself.)


The lizards ate his face off. And I'm not shocked. You had to see it coming. Everyone talking about you on the show did, anyway. Maybe they're just really in tune with the obvious. Or maybe they all called Cleo.

Then there was the southern bell from loony Looziana. This gentle spirit was attacked by her black jaguar, which grabbed her by the scalp.



When the police showed up to her house and shot the jaguar, it let her go. And when it let her go, her scalp was hanging over her face. And her exact words were "Oh, how embarrassing." That's where I lost it. I laughed so hard I can't even describe it.

I honestly don't see what it is that makes these people want deadly animals as pets. Especially when all their friends are smart enough to warn them of the dangers. If anything, I feel bad for the animals that have to die because they do what they live to do, hunt & kill. Overall I would give the show 4/4 stars. It's great, and I love hearing these incredibly ridiculous stories.

Fatal Attractions airs Sundays at 9pm Eastern and Pacific.


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Massive Minaj Attack



Nicki Minaj's first official single Massive Attack featuring Sean Garrett has leaked. Head over to Good Fella Radio for more.

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It's about sex. In my opinion, the song is dumb. But it's probably going to end up a huge radio hit or something. You can listen to it here on Christina's website.

Edit: As a follow up to last weeks post there was no confetti blasting from my speakers. And time did not slow down. You are now a stranger bitch, Mrs. Aguilera.

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Like, I don't get it. The whole Justin Bieber thing. I guess because I've gone through puberty and know good music.

Yeah I'm pretty sure that has something to do with it.

I log onto Youtube to see if there's any new videos from my subscriptions. No, but I see one of the featured videos. A three year old crying over none other than Justin Bieber. Like boo hoo-ing like she just got hit with a truck. She said because she "didn't get to see him today" and she wants him to be "one of the family".

At the end of the video I decided though that it was fake and was even more convinced that it might be fake when I saw the link to another video where the family got to meet Booger Bieber because he saw it.

I have to go. I must find a toddler to pretend to be mine and cry because she hasn't seen Kid Cudi today.

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SMH...oh no...

Dear Usher,

I hope that this isn't for publicity, you know, with the CD coming out tomorrow and all. This would make everyone want to download it for free, I'm just saying.

Sincerely,
The writers at FPC



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Just wanted to check in and let you all know what I'm interested in purchasing this week that way you know that you might (or might not, but I still love you) see a review for it in the future.

Now I have to bat my eyelashes at my BF and throw hints at him that I need an iTunes giftcard, lol. More after the jump!

  • Alvin and the Chimpmunks: The Squeakquel: I wanted to see this when it came out in theatres but never got around to it. I enjoyed the first movie (don't judge me) and heard through the grapevine that this one was cute too. Plus I want to see the Chimpettes sing "Single Ladies".
  • New Amerykah Pt. 2: Return of the Ankh: The only Erykah Badu I currently own is Baduizm and that's a shame cause I love her. I was just watching Dave Chappelle's Block Party last night and it reminded me that this CD was coming out. I like the single she has out now "Window Seat" and knew I had to get this when she on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
  • Raymond v. Raymond: When I heard "Papers" I said "No Usher, try again." Then I heard "Hey Daddy" then "There Goes My Baby" then "Lil Freak" and decided I would give this one a try. His sixth studio album and critics are giving it good ratings so far, I'm looking forward to giving this one a listen.


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I guess everyone has been spending there past two and a half weeks coming up with their ideas for parodies of Lady GaGa's "Telephone" video because I'm starting to see a lot of them pop up. I know I've seen more than two of them but it's only two of them that I remember watching. The dude's version and the one featured here in this post. The dude's version was ok. It didn't exactly have me slapping me knee. Probably just made me smile a few times.


Then there's the version from Barely Digital, which made me laugh but still not knee slapping. Check it out after the jump.


This one features some look-a-likes playing GaGa and Honey B and for those of you who didn't really get the concept of the video at first *raises hand* you might like this one. In it, GaGa is explaining to Beyonce what she wants in her video and it doesn't sit well with Bey. But I don't think GaGa is gonna give her a choice...


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You Got It In Her Hair

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The Kids Choice Awards thing was on last night. I didn't watch but I did catch this little gem while I was hanging out with my friends. Katy Perry got slimed in the face. And she took it like a champ. When I first saw it I was like DAMN!

I'm not even playing when I say it looked like it hurt a lot. Video after the jump.


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80's Music in 2010

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I'm just gonna throw it out there, I love Goldfrapp's new album Head First. When I first heard that it was going to be an 80's style album, I was kind of worried because let's face it I don't really care about the 80's. But I only needed to listen to some of the songs once to fall in love. Read on for the rest of my review.



The track listing is as follows:
1. Rocket – 3:51
2. Believer – 3:43
3. Alive – 3:28
4. Dreaming – 5:07
5. Head First – 4:30
6. Hunt – 4:34
7. Shiny and Warm – 3:58
8. I Wanna Life – 4:13
9. Voicething – 4:44

My favorite tracks from the album are by far Dreaming, Hunt, and Voicething. The funny thing about Voicething is that there's no lyrics. It's like an instrumental but that's probably not the right word to describe it. Her voice is present throughout the song, but she's not saying anything as much as she's making noise like 'yup' and 'huh'.

Rocket, the lead single from the cd is so-so. I don't like it as much as I like the rest of the songs. It's still got that 80's vibe, but it just doesn't sit right with me.

Something interesting I noticed (or may be imagining), a few of the songs seem to share a common beat. I'm too lazy to name the songs, but it's like a slightly altered beat from Rocket hidden within the songs.

Reviews from people who are paid to review things say the album is around the 3/4 star area, and I agree. It has more ups than downs, and that's what makes this album great.

(I apologize for my crappy review. I have no idea what I am talking about.)


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I really have no idea what is going on with this viral video campaign. I didn't have any idea before, but it's like I have less of one than I did before. The audio from last weeks video 'b' is on iTunes. Of course I bought it. You should too.

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Let me start by saying that I wouldn't actually consider myself a fan of Monica, but I do like her music and her voice is very beautiful. I still get excited when I hear "So Gone" come on! She totally and completely did her thing on that track. I'm starting to sound like a fan now, huh?

Before we get into this review let's rewind to 2006, before Soulja Boy and Bump-Its, the world was such a better place. This was the same year Monica released her previous album, The Makings of Me. Then it was on my iPod, now it's not even on my computer. Even looking at the album cover, you could tell it was a very different Monica than what we were used to. The tracks on that CD were somewhat a disappointment, I remember only liking a few of them. The rest you could tell she was trying to sound like what everyone else had out at the time. From then to now, Monica has done a full 180 360 180. It's different! Check out the full review below.

"Still Standing" is giving me all that I need right now. I'm trying to think of another R&B album by a female that I'm digging right now and nothing but this comes to mind. I didn't even listen to Alicia Keys' last album like that and I loves me some Alicia!

If you haven't heard "Everything to Me" from Monica yet, crawl from under that rock you've been under *cough*subscribetothisblog*cough* and get a life. This is just one of the few love songs on here. My favorites: "Superman", "Love All Over Me" and "Everything..." There's also the break-up songs, girl get over that sorry a...ahem: "Stay or Go", "Believing In Me". And then the kind of song that you listen to when you have your eye on someone special "If You Were My Man" (loooooove that track) and "Here I am". That pretty much covers the whole album except for a few songs.

I suggest though that you take a listen for yourself. I promise you will not be disappointed.

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It's a wonder you still have any fans left

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Come on son. It's a wonder you still have any fans left, Christina. You're being pretty low budget. No new material in years and then when you finally announce that you've got a new album coming out you keep pushing the date back? Postponing it every five minutes? What are you waiting for?


This album you're working on better be made of gold, and when I hear the first single confetti better blast out of my speakers and time should slow down (that line goes to Quinn). I'm not a fan but I am interested to see what you are going to do, considering the amount of time it's taking you to release an album. However by the looks of the cover it's going to be tacky and probably low budget.

And that countdown on your website? What was that about? I see it on Saturday, counting down to 12pm on Monday. Monday rolls around and it's now counting down to Tuesday at 12pm. Tuesday comes around and all we get is a song name (Not Myself Tonight), a single cover, and another countdown clock counting down to Wednesday. You could have at least released the single today. Like I said earlier, what are you waiting for?

My guess is that Not Myself Tonight is about sex. We'll find out soon...

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Usher "Lil Freak"




While everybody else is putting Nicki Minaj on their single, Usher went and featured Cruella de Minaj for his second single from Raymond v. Raymond. How clever. Full review when we get the full video.

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According to this source, Mariah Carey's Angels Advocate has been shelved. Originally planned to come out next week, it seems as if the album has been scrapped due to poor performance on Mariah's part. Or no one gives a shit. Like Miss Sidibe.

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For those of you who didn't know, Angel's Advocate was an album consisting of remixes from the Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel and all the other crap that didn't make it on there the first time.

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This Week In Music

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Here's what to expect over the next few days:



Monday, March 22nd

Christina Aguilera has been stringing her fans along for years now (not including me). She hasn't released a new album in over 3 years, and finally we're starting to see some increased action from her. What's next? If this robo promotion and the countdown clock on her site are any indication, it looks like we're going to see something big from our this bionic chick tomorrow around 12pm. After the speculation over the last three months that Christina Aguilera was Iamamiwhoami, I can only hope that what she has planned is even more amazing than that. Otherwise... ouch.

Tuesday, March 23rd
Goldfrapp: Goldfrapp's long awaited 5th studio album Head First will be released internationally on the 22nd, and domestically (North America) on the 23rd. I've been waiting for this new album since Seventh Tree wrapped up, and I'm excited to hear some new music from Allison.

Justin Bieber: The latter half to his two-part debut album, My World 2.0, is set for release March 23, 2010. Includes his lead single, "Baby" feat. Ludacris.

Monica: Still Standing, the sixth studio album from R&B singer will be released on March 23rd. While I wouldn't actually consider myself a fan of Monica, I do like her music and am looking forward to the release of this album.

Doesn't look like there's much happening this week in terms of music.



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Iamamiwhoami has logged into youtube as of 52 minutes ago. As we all (I) know, Iamamiwhoami only logs into youtube to upload new videos. That's all for now. I'll leave you with her previous gem, uploaded last sunday.


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Tiger woods should write a book. And that would be the perfect title. The hoe Tiger was messing around with put his text's online. Here they are, in their repulsive glory. (Featuring commentary by both Lucas & Quinn)


*(These are just some of the text messages)

Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/28/2009:
I want to be deep inside you

Tiger:Sent: 03:30 PM 08/29/2009:
Me to. I would wear you out

Tiger:Sent: 03:36 PM 08/29/2009:
After i cum you better start sucking my cock to get it hard

Tiger:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:
Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own

Tiger:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:
Then im going to tell you to shut the Fuck up while i slap your face and pull your hair for making noise

Tiger:Sent: 04:21 PM 08/29/2009:
Where do you want to be bitten

Tiger:Sent: 04:24 PM 08/29/2009:
Ok. Now your talking. Whatever i want. You are mine

Tiger:Sent: 12:35 PM 09/07/2009:
You just make sure you take care of me when you get here


Tiger:Sent: 07:12 PM 09/07/2009:
No turkey unless it's a club sandwich

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Quinn: Yeah. That was the face I made about 19 messages into this mess. Not that the first 18 messages didn't shock me because they did. Tiger, Tiger, Tiger. Smh. You know if he's anything like Chris Brown and no one wants anything to do with him after his return to the golf world, he could always be a porn star. Or phone actor, or write/direct/produce adult films. I want to see the inbox messages because you know she was like, "This is your kitty Tiger, yeah, of course I've done it all you silly goose, haven't you seen my movies?" But I digress...

The way he was talking to this female! I really hope she had it in her head that she was the sideline hoe cause clearly that's the way he was talking to her. Talking about slapping her around and biting and pulling hair and shoving golf clubs up...oh...that wasn't in there? My bad. I love how he tries to be careful though. You can tell he was more devoted to keeping this a secret than making sure everything was spelled correctly. And the end where he was worried about how they might have gotten caught. Hilarious. Oh Tiger, you crack me up.

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Lucas: I'll just let Judge Judy handle this because I'm at a loss for words. I never imagined Tiger Woods to be like this. But then again Tiger Woods rarely crosses my mind as Golf is boring and stupid. I have nothing more to say.



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I'm not gonna front, I loves me some Alicia Keys. I have all her music and she's one of the few singers with great acting skills (Beyonce, not so much). Give the lyrics, I'll name the song, I love Alicia Keys.

I'm going to get to the point but let me say first, this "set a date for your video premiere then keep pushing it back", who started this and why? I think it's pretty stupid. I don't like it, I can't think of anybody that likes it. Artists really need to step their game up. Now the first time that I was aware of these shenanigans was when the "Video Phone" video was coming out. I can't remember the date but at 5 p.m. EST they were gonna show it on MTV. Me and I'm pretty sure 100% of the gay population and I'll say just a small percentage of the rest of America tuned in at said time for disappointment. "Telephone" video, same thing. Before The Fame Monster was released I loved that song, had the ring tone and all. By the time I saw the video, my ring tone had changed like three times.

Alicia Keys' video for "Put It In a Love Song" feat. Beyonce was filmed last month. It has had three different release dates now. I read somewhere yesterday that it's still being edited and may not be released until mid-April (sorry, can't find the link).

Now I've said all of this to say that I believe Lady GaGa is a little more...I guess we could use the word...wanted? Sure both of them are successful internationally and both have Grammy's and yada yada yada but we can be patient (not really) waiting on GaGa's video. Alicia's, not so much.

So while we continue to wait because the video we supposed to premiere yesterday but I haven't seen it, you can enjoy the next best thing below the jump.




P.S. Y'all see those 20 million views "Telephone" has gotten in a week? Dayum.

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In our last post, Lucas (my light-skinned lover) introduced us to Robyn's new single, "Fembots Have Feelings Too". If you haven't heard it, go take a listen, I'll wait...


Catchy, right? If you're anything like me you are dancing in your seat right now. If you're anything like my sister, you are popping your booty right now. Most definitely a dance record. Funky beat, funny lyrics ("i got a lot of automatic booty applications"), and yeah fembots do have feelings too! Get it together!!

Did not know what to expect from this song or artist before I first heard it but now I'm anxious to hear the entire CD, Body Talk, when it's released. That all I have. Ta ta for now my loves.

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Robyn Is A Fembot



Her new song, Fembot, from her upcoming album Body Talk.

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This monday started a new season of MTV's documentary series True Life (which incidentally is like the only thing MTV is good for anymore). In this episode, a young man and a young woman both need transplants in order to survive.

Craig is a newlywed with Leukemia, and Morgan needs a new Kidney. The episode is one of these days most serious topics (really: "I'm under Peer Pressure" "I'm Graduating High School" "I Don't Fit In" "I'm Jealous". There's nothing special about any of those topics. Because I'm 99.9% sure everyone has been all of these things. Come on son.). I didn't cry or tear up during the episode but I did feel for the Craig and Morgan. Morgan was getting a kidney from her mom. I distinctly remember her saying that even though her sister has a better chance of a matching type kidney, she was going to get one from her mother because "was afraid of needles". Right. Bitch. Wait, that's not right. I'm not sure what I would say if a sibling asked me for an organ... After she got her transplant, she had to take pills twice a day for the rest of her life to keep the new kidney working. I was like WHAAAAT?!? IS U SERIOUS MORGAN?!? Morgan was surprisingly calm and optimistic for someone about to be sliced open, organs ripped out, and another one jammed in there.

But that's just a kidney. Extracting bone marrow? Yikes. Long story short they jam a needle in your hip bone and suck out the red stuff on the inside. Craig's brother was the one to donate the bone marrow to him. After the procedure was over Craig and his wife and mom were just sitting in his hospital room and I started to wonder how a parent must feel when their child gets sick or is born sick? I hate kids. I will never know. This reminds me of that book My Sisters Keeper. Well, everything except for the brother being born just to keep the other one alive. That is messed up. Well I can gladly say that both Morgan and Craig lived. Craig's white blood cell count went up. Morgan's kidney was working pretty fine and she moved out of her parents house and went to college. The last thing I remember in the episode that I really care to talk about was when Craig was getting the medicine he needed injected into his heart. He said that he could taste the meds even though they went straight into his mouth. What.

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Kid's Choice Awards 2010



This morning I woke up to Mighty B on my TV. If you're not familiar with that it's a cartoon on Nickelodeon. (Don't judge me, bro.) A commercial comes on for the Kid's Choice Awards 2010 and it's one i haven't seen before. I believe the only other one I've seen is with Adam Sandler and Kevin James. This new one however, informed us that there would be live performances by Rihanna and Justin Bieber. Now the latter I totally understand. This kid just like fell out of the sky into tween girls' hearts all over the world. It is very seldom that you do not see his name as a trending topic on Twitter and I won't even lie, after the first time I heard "One Time" I went and added it to my iPod. But this isn't about Justin Bieber.

This is about Rihanna and her live performance. Now this is for the Kid's Choice Awards on Nickelodeon. Rihanna's latest album was Rated R and her latest single is "Rude Boy". What song is she gonna perform in front of these kids?

Her singles have been:
  • "Russian Roulette" which I think may be too depressing to perform
  • "Hard" if she does perform this one I hope she has already learned substitute words for the choice words in the song
  • "Rude Boy" yeah, we so do not need little teeny boppers singing to their Justin Bieber posters asking if he's big enough
Now I did not mention "Wait Your Turn" simply because I really don't consider it a single. I never even heard it on the radio, but i digress. Let's say though that she performs another one of her songs from Rated R, it's still too much for the kids!! But, after I scratch my head a few times and really think about it, I can't think of anyone else they could get to perform. Jonas Brothers? Miley Cyrus? Is that allowed since they're both Disney?

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To Whom It May Concern


For the past three months I have been captivated with a series of viral videos on Youtube. User Iamamiwhoami has (since early December) been uploading a series of short viral videos featuring a dirty, large eyed blonde female. What are the videos about? Your guess is as good as mine, but they keep getting better and better. For quite a while now, forums on the internet have been busy with threads speculating as to who was behind the videos (myself included). I've been lurking a few sites, and for a while now I've been almost entirely certain that it's Christina Aguilera. I'm not a fan, but at least it's someone I've heard of.

Well that was all until this weeks brand new video. This video, uploaded Sunday night is four minutes long. In it, the woman is wrapped entirely in plastic that puts me in mind of a burn victim. Do I still think it's Christina? Not so much. I'm leaning more toward Jonna Lee. Why? She's apparently been posting images on her Twitter that appear to be the set of some of the Iamamiwhoami videos. I’m short on time for now. Expect more later.

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Seems like every week I have a different song that I'm constantly listening to. Last week it was Usher's "There Goes My Baby" and before that it was B.o.B. feat. Bruno Mars "Nothing On You" (which happens to be MTV Jam's Jam of the week). Anywho, it's not something I do on purpose, it just...happens. I'm always looking for what's new and what's hot on the music scene and most times I find something really good and I can't stop listening to it.

This week, its Aloe Blacc "I Need A Dollar". If you're like me and Sunday nights at around 9:55 pm you're making sure there's nothing you have to leave the room for so you can be ready to watch "How to Make It In America", then you've heard the song. It's so catchy. I watched a few episodes OnDemand and seeing it back-to-back had the song in my head all day. I'm not exactly sure what to call this sound though. It could fit into the soul genre and it sounds "old" (a term I'm using loosely) but nothing like The Temptations would sing. Get it?

No hidden meaning here (that I'm aware of), it's simply about needing to make some money. It fits the show perfectly, which deserves a post of it's own. And I can relate to it because if there's anything i need right about now it's a dollar! Makes me wish I had a hustle...



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Welcome, part two

“Mmmhmmm, honey b.” *munch* I’m Lucas. The second half of this blog. The crème to this Oreo. The milk in our cookies. Like Quinn said, the Lady Gaga to this Telephone video. You’re not going to agree with everything I say. And Quinn just told you that. Like she said, it’s just an opinion blog, where we review anything that happens in America. The good thing about this blog is that you can share your opinion in the comments. So go ahead, comment.

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Hi kids! Welcome to Fresh Popped Culture! I’m only one half of the team giving my opinion to you on the latest music, movies, television, and “every other random slice of information that could be considered American pop culture”. Now, you won’t always agree with me and that’s ok! That’s what I’m here for to give my opinion. Your opinion is valued as well. Leave a comment, let us know what you think on the current topic(s). Also, let us know if there is anything you’d like to see on the site. We're very excited about this and want you to fell the same way. Again, I’m only half of the team here. You’ll soon meet Lucas, the Lady GaGa to my Honey B if this were the “Telephone” video.

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