Bey on a Break?

"Why Don't You Love Me" - Beyoncé from Beyoncé on Vimeo.

Jay-Z retired but had three albums since then. Beyonce is taking a break but released a video for "Why Don't You Love Me". I think this may be what makes this family dysfunctional. Pretty catchy tune. I like it.

CH.AG: Part Three

This deserves it's own banner. Welcome to Flopgate '10, everybody. Over the past few days most of my posts have been directed at Christina Aguilera. Well the reason is it was pretty much a Tyra Banks situation: We were all rooting for her. And then she gives us this generic single Not Myself Tonight. Like we've never heard that before. Furthermore, when images and previews for the single begin to surface, it becomes apparent how desperate she is. I know, I know, Lady Gaga does this kind of stuff too, but one thing that separates the two is that CH.AG has a child. This is completely inappropriate. What the hell are you going to do when you're child is a teenager? More like what the hell is your child going to think when he sees this video? A new promotional image under the cut. NSFW (Possibly)




(I was disappointed to find no visible nipple in this picture.)



Source

Tv Guide cleans up some Tra$h

My mom read me the most amazing Jeer I've ever heard from TV Guide. The topic? None other than Ke$ha:

Jeers to Ke$ha for her what-up-with-that? performances on Saturday Night Live. The poor man's Lady Gaga tried and failed to turn "Tik Tok," her ode to being a drunken floozy, into a political/artistic statement. Amid a dime-store laser show, she asked "Does anybody ever stop to think that maybe we are the aliens?" That could be the only explanation for her appearance in Lite Brite-like body paint for a ludicrously bizarro rendition of "Your Love Is My Drug." Tik tok, Ke$ha- that's your 15 seconds of fame running out.

More FUCKERY from Christina

It seems lately that most of my posts have been Christina Aguilera related. Well there's good reason. She's giving me so much to rip on. Like the following pics, and another 11 second preview. I give epileptics fair warning. These probably aren't SFW either.



A new 11 second preview of the video (Which premieres Friday on Vevo):



and a few pics (possibly NSFW):









I think people are going to like these for the wrong reason. You can't look at these and say 'Christina sure has artistic talent.'




This post comes to you from ONTD and Just Jared.

Cmon Christina

I get more and more excited for this flop as the video premiere gets closer. The only thing that can save this thing from being a flop is if the video is amazing. But by the looks of it...no. After an 11 second preview, she might not have any epileptic buddies behind her anymore.

Free Music, Anyone?

If anybody likes anything for free, it's me. What's better than anything for free? Music for free. And what's better than that? Good music for free. I recommend downloading "Air Swell" by Chiddy Bang and enjoying it while you go about your business for the day. I promise you won't be disappointed. Happy Friday!!

Before today I didn't know anything about this group but now I'm glad that I do. What can I say about these talented artists? The music reminds me of Kanye West circa College Dropout because the rhymes are just as perfect as the beats. Some of these tracks are most definitely going on a playlist with Lupe, Kid Cudi, and Wale. Check it out for yourself though. It's free, why not?

Body Talk Pt. 1 LEAK

Robyn's Body Talk pt. 1 has leaked in it's entirety. It's no big deal because there's only eight songs, and we've heard four of them already. The only songs we (well, I) haven't heard are Don't Fucking Tell Me What To Do, Cry When You Get Older, Hang With Me [Acoustic], and Jag Vet En Dejlig Rosa. Until now anyway...



I'm not going to provide a link to download it, you'll have to find it yourself. But most of the songs are pretty great, if you like that kind of music. And if you don't, what is wrong with you. Don't Fucking Tell Me What To Do is hilarious, with lyrics like "My drinkings killing me, My smoking is killing me, My diet is killing me, My shopping's killing me..." it's definitely worth a listen. Cry When You Get Older is really great too. Hang With Me [Acoustic] is ok, if you like acoustic music, and Jag Vet En Dejlig Rosa should be skipped unless you know Svenska. If you just said "what is Svenska?" then just skip the song because you don't know. It's also kind of creepy.

Overall, I give this album a 4/5 stars. And if you do manage to get your hands on a copy before June, then congratulations.

Don't Worry Girl, I Gotchu..

I'm going to help Christina Aguilera and her people out and save them some time by doing this (below the jump):



No I don't get any recognition for it, but it gives her and her team more time to pretend that she's the sh*t.

I don't have a source for this because my source is the person who sent me a text to tell me about it but Christina Aguilera's "Not a Stranger Bitch Not Myself Tonight" video is set to premiere on May 1st.

Now if she's got her head up her rear like she did last month, this will be pushed back a couple of times. As a matter of fact, I'll put money on it because despite the fact that she hasn't had anything new in a while she pushes back countdowns like Beyonce or Lady GaGa. (Sidenote: Anybody heard anything about the "Put It In a Love Song" video?)

I'm going to be nice though because if she really thought she was on GaGa's level, she'd have Dick Clark on Times Square with a ball dropping for this premiere and I haven't heard of her doing that yet.

I Vote No...

This is going to be really quick. Like super quick. Like don't blink too hard because you'll be at the end of this post.

My blog baby daddy Lucas thought this was the WTF video of the week but I love @alonzolerone so I have to disagree. This right here, will leave me shaking my head and thinking WTF for the rest of the week.

Wtf Video of the Week

This week's WTF Video of the Week comes from youtube user alonzolerone. It's of course a parody of a scene from Gaga's Telephone video. I must give him props though, this one actually has a girl playing Honey Bey. Video after the jump.





From the looks of it, eating a honey bun like Gaga isn't as easy as one would think.

Mr. Bond...

In an effort to sway our bias away from American pop culture music, here is a post about a movie.



According to this website the 23rd James Bond movie has been suspended indefinitely. Why?

"Due to the continuing uncertainty surrounding the future of MGM and the failure to close a sale of the studio, we have suspended development on 'Bond 23' indefinitely. We do not know when development will resume and do not have a date for the release of 'Bond 23,'"

Apparently MGM is low budget, can't afford to keep itself running, or what have you. Honestly I'm not very sad. The past two Bond movies (Casino Royale, Quantum of Solace) haven't really done anything for me. Daniel Craig just isn't Bond material. To me Pierce Brosnan will always be the original James Bond



and that's really only because he reminds me of esteemed Broadway producer Maxwell Sheffield.



It's kind of sad because the Bond franchise is the longest running film series in history.

Source

What I'm listening to now

A few days ago on Rip The Runway, I caught Estelle performing Freak and ever since it's been stuck in my head. So it's my current listen. Video after the cut






I'm not even going to bother to watch the video all the way through. From the first minute or so I can tell that it's a Missy Elliot level theme. I mean, with that hair Estelle even looks like Missy Misdemeanor.

Really, though, the only part of the song I like is the "I can be a freak" part. Otherwise, no thank you.

More New Robyn!

Are we dead yet? I don't think so. Dancing On My Own, a song from Robyn's Body Talk album has leaked today. I like it.

Top 100s by Year by Bing

It's seven o'clock a.m. and I'm lying in bed and can't sleep. Usually when this happens, I play with my iPod. You guys, I think I've discovered the best music app ever.

Bing has created an app for iPhone and iPod touch users that has the top 100 songs from each year from 1947 to 2009. The name of it is "Top 100s by year by Bing", (ooo so blatant). Get it right now for free!! I'm not sure how long it will be free so hurry and check it out now!! Full description after the jump.

Spin the wheel to choose what year you'd like to hear music from and the app shuffles the top 100 songs for you. You do have the option of skipping past songs you prefer not to listen to. However, the app states to provide all the music at such a low price (right now free, it says the normal price is $1.99), they are required to shuffle the music for you instead of you choosing what you'd like to listen to.

This didn't turn me off one bit. What I did not like about the app is that every now again, well every three or four songs, a Bing app plays and asks you to download the Bing app for your iPhone/iPod touch. It will continue to do this even if you've downloaded the app already. Besides that, no complaints, especially since it was free. I suggest you check it out too, at least while it's still free.

New Robyn Songs

Due out in June, Robyn's new album is shaping up to be something pretty good. Dance Hall Queen showed up online a few months ago, and is nice. Fembot (the full version) was put on her website a week or so ago, and now None of Dem is ready to be listened too. It might take a few times to grow on you, but I love it. You can even record a video of you dancing and upload it to her site for others to see.

Also, these new Robyn songs are available on Amazon.com. What, no iTunes love?

Read more for the latest updates from Iamamiwhoami.



It's been a month or so since any new material from Iamamiwhoami surfaced on the internet. Starting on the 8th, however, we began to see some signs of life from the viral video's creater. As mentioned previously, Tara Busch released a remix of the single 'b', which is now available to download.

Then later that same evening, someone noticed that a new single had appeared on Amazon. The release date for O was scheduled as April 11, 2010. That day came, and we all listened, and realized that O was an edited version of the music from the sixth video. Six minutes and forty seconds long, the guitar sample had disappeared and was instead replaced by more bass, and the distortion on the voice was gone entirely. Fans have since been split over whether or not they love it or hate it.

I hoped for a video, but didn't expect one because after all, it was the same music from the sixth video. Well I wake up this morning to find a new video waiting in my subscriptions. I watch it. And it's amazing. Like usual there's a whole bunch of mystery surrounding it, and no one is sure what it all means.

Here's where the story get's a little more interesting. Number one suspect Jonna Lee has since deleted her Twitter account. This is interesting because she has been known for tweeting clues (or at least what people assume are clues) about her involvement in the video saga. She tweeted eight or so months ago about "being covered in mud for the next two days" and was even bold enough to tweet a picture of a set with a pool filled with murky water, oddly similar to video three. Apparently, thanks to the geniuses at Popjustice we found out that Jonna tweeted something regarding the new video we received today. After the tweet in question was brought up, she hastily deleted her twitter account, leaving behind the message

Love to you all, see you later alligators.

Also, Popjustice users pointed out that this morning around the time that the newest video was uploaded, Tara Busch tweeted a picture of strawberries. If you didn't know, strawberries have been a recurring theme in these videos (See videos three, five, six, and eight).

Hmmm. Curiouser and Curiouser.

More from Christina Aguilera

Christina Aguilera has been hard at work ever since she released that awful single Not Myself Tonight. Today we have two pictures, each trying a little too hard.






Take it from most everyone on the internet, Christina: You're doing the bionic theme wrong.


Source and Source

On My iPod...

This should have been done two weeks ago but I have this best friend, Procrastination, and I have to stay loyal to her.

If you have not listened to Erykah Badu's latest, New Amerykah Pt. 2: Return of the Anhk, please do yourself a favor and do so. Now this is one you should not pick up from the flea market or Wal-Mart's parking lot. You have to (HAVE TO) purchase it from iTunes, or Target, or FYE, or actually inside Wal-Mart.

Now I wouldn't be telling you to buy it if it wasn't good. And if anybody knows good music, it's yours truly. It's kind of hard to put Ms. Badu into just one genre but I can definitely call this soul music. She's got a unique sound to her music that I just love. My favorite track right now, well there's two, are "Gone Baby, Don't Be Long" and "Umm Hmm". But I think you should check out the whole thing.

Then there's the "Window Seat" video everyone is talking about. I find it very creative and it's really interesting that it was shot guerrilla-style. I also appreciate the fact that it introduced me to the concept, groupthink. Something we should all take a deeper look at.

Follow Erykah Badu on Twitter @fatbellybella

Benjamin Button Wants to Know Who the Eff Are You?

I know I'm not the only person who checks Facebook and Twitter before I'm in a vertical position for the first time all day. This morning's trending topics on Twitter featured Drake or as I like to call him, Benjamin Button.

So all the hype this morning was because Drake's video for "Over" was released. His first single from his debut album, "Thank Me Later" due to be released in June. He's not one of the artists I'm running to the record store for, I'd rather hit up the bootleg man in Wal-Mart's parking lot.

Honestly, if I had not read this I probably would not have ever understood the song, ever. And while the video does not include Drake standing in milk or making it rain on anyone, I don't think it ties into the song. Or maybe I need to watch it again *kanyeshrug*. Really, I think the "Best I Ever Had" video went better with the song. The song didn't go with the video, maybe that's what's happening here. At least Jimmy is breaking the fourth wall.

Check out the video after the jump!

The Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth

It's been a while hasn't it? I apologize. I can't promise it won't happen again though, lol.

So this morning I wake up to Chrisette Michele putting the gossip blog I love to hate on blast. You know, the one that rhymes with "In-Di-Go". When I tell you it's so hard to believe anything they post on there, yet I keep going back. It's like that little boy dancing in tights to "Rude Boy", it's so bad but you can't look away.

When I first saw the story on that blog about Chrisette Michele shaving her head bald, I couldn't do anything but shake my hit and hit the little red box with the "X" in it up in the top right hand corner. What better way to find out the truth then hearing it from the horse's mouth! Check out this interview from @afrobella with Miss Chrisette Michele herself on how it really went down!

More on the Viral Videos That No One Follows But Me

It's been more than three weeks since we've seen a new video from Iamamiwhoami. Things everywhere on the internet regarding her have since calmed down. Until today. According to analogsuicide.com (don't judge me, I'm not suicidal, I only found out about that website today) Tara Busch was anonymously contacted via email where she received HQ audio stems for the audio from 'b'. According to her, the only instructions she recieved with the email read "08.04.10". So she did what any producer would do and remixed the audio stems and released it today, the 8th of April, 2010. Normally I would be a little more skeptical of these "anonymous emails", but I'm going to believe that Iamamiwhoami contacted Tara directly, because the vocals in the remix are for the most part undistorted, unlike in the 'b' video. What does this mean? Who knows. I'm just excited for some sort of activity from her.

Here the remix and read more from Tara herself at the Source.

The Boondocks Season 3

I saw this while surfing the interwebs on yesterday. Not exactly what I would call a trailer. More like some clips from the show over a song. However, I'm kind of happy about this. I thought The Boondocks was cancelled because whenever I see it it's an old episode. The third season will be the last season though.

Rihkeshaminaj on Tour

The only thing I could come up with that these three have in common is that they were all in school at one point in their lives.

Lucas: Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, and Kesha are touring together this year.

Quinn: That's the most random group of people I could probably come up with.

Lucas: I just do not understand this combination. Like Bjork, Trey Songz, and Adele.

Quinn: Wale, Elton John, and Backstreet Boys.

Lucas: Lance Bass and Ricky Martin...oh wait...How does Kesha get in contact with someone like Nicki Minaj?

Quinn: You mean how does Nicki Minaj get in contact with Kesha? She sleeps in a tub with one shoe on. I'd put money on it that she thinks Blackberry Messenger is someone who delivers fruit.

Rihanna has announced that her Last Girl on Earth tour will hit the road this summer. Making 25 stops, starting in Seattle on July 2 and ending August 25 in Chicago, RiRi put names in a hat and randomly selected Kesha and Nicki Minaj for her opening acts.

No, seriously, that's the only way this could have happened. I do have to admit though, if this came to my city, I would seriously consider going. I'd make sure I get there right at the end of Nicki's performance and just when Rihanna is about to say "All up on it, know you wanna clone it, ain't like me that chic too phony, ride this beat beat beat like a pony". And I'd rather not see Kesha at all.

Meanwhile...

Source


****Update****
So up until this point, this post was written prior to Nicki Minaj announcing that she would not be joining Rihanna on tour this summer. So the question is, what random person will the replacement?

Keep It Classy, Ciara

I'm often not shocked at the things that celebrities do. I am however shocked at how not-shocked I was when I saw pics of Ciara on the set for her video ride. All I can say is Keep it classy, Ciara.

Head over to Thisisrnb.com for more shockingly typical Ciara pictures.

Robyn's New Album

Robyn is getting ready to release part one of her new album Body Talk. There was a short advert for the album sleeve uploaded on Vimeo, but the site is having some problems it seems so for the time being I'll leave you with that regular non-moving picture up there.

Popjustice

ETA: Album sleeve advert now uploaded, hit read more to watch.

Body Talk Pt.1 is coming! from Robyn on Vimeo.

Quinn's Going to Put This In A Letter Bomb

It looks like the video for Put It In A Love Song has been delayed...again. Come on, Alicia. You're on your way to becoming a stranger bitch faster than Christina Aguilera.
During an interview with Rap-up.com, Alicia was asked about the video featuring beyonce, in which she replied

Expect it right after my ‘Un-thinkable’ video. It’s kind of nice that I have such a great video and such a great artist in the can.

Looks like Beyonce is getting put on the back burner in favor of Drizzy Drake. Quinn will not be happy.

Read more for ****EDIT by quinny_b****

Really Alicia? I kind of saw this coming when I was in the car the other day and "Unthinkable" came on the radio. I turned it up and cleared my throat to sing along not thinking that this should be "Put It in a Love Song" playing. *sigh* Do you Alicia. I'm not signing your checks.

I'll wait.




Source

TWOTD

This Tweet of the Day goes to @Freshalina for this tweet:

Wait. Did Keri Hilson's PR people REALLY just send out a release about her "redeeming herself" by singing the national anthem correctly?

In regards to this colossal screw up from the original stranger bitch Keri Hilson.

Wtf Videos of the Week

Today I have two videos for you, in a new category called Wtf Videos of the Week. The first video was sent to me by Quinn. The second video was posted on my wall on Facebook. Read more to see the videos.





Once you get past this ones makeup, she has something to say. And she defends (I think?) Gwen Stefani, so she's got a friend in me. I just wish she would figure out what to do with... that on her face. The best part of the video is actually the comments from other viewers, like this gem from SHAKA5474:

ok this video was made for what reason... your a strawberry Shortcake chick.. ur makeup is garbage.. LMAO please tell me this was for publicity and exposure

Oddly enough, this is what I stumbled upon on my search for a strawberry shortcake girl:



And then there's this.



I knew something was going to be wrong with this video when he said "acapello". As if his own description

I don't think this was a good one. My voice was really I off that the ending I think, whats your opinion. Please as always comment, rate, and subscribe.

wasn't enough. I feel bad for Monica. He destroys her harder than Jennifer Lopez destroyed five seconds of Barbara Streisand

Just Wright

I was surfing the world wide web the other other day and came across the movie trailer for Just Wright. Starring Queen Latifah, Paula Patton, and Common, this will be in a theatre near you May 14th.

This could turn out one of two ways. It could have the predictive plot that most Queen Latifah movies have and sometimes bad acting, but I'm not really worried about that (yes I am *cough*Common*cough*). OR, I could be so hypnotized by seeing Common with his shirt off and Dwyane Wade on the big screen that the $10 for the ticket and $15 for popcorn and drinks will be worth is. Either way, I'm still going to give a chance but not one the weekend because I want the discount ticket price. Check out the trailer below the jump!

iPhone 4.0 OS

Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye, I was telling Lucas the other day that I was looking forward to what the new iPhone had to offer. Now I'm excited. Way more excited than I was when Christina Augilera's countdown ended. But that's totally different.

April 8th can't get here fast enough.

Source

A Message From the Moderator

Please bear with us as I continue to work with the layout on FPC. I hope to have things settled by the end of today (Monday, April 5th 2010) with posting returning to normal later this evening or earlier tomorrow. Thank you for your patience.

Dang Miss Jennifer Hudson

Jennifer Hudson. When did this even happen? I cannot process this information. This is an entirely different person altogether. Either way, good for you.


Source

Madtv Saw This Coming

Tomorrow every apple fanboy is going to shit bricks when they get their hands on the iPad, also known as the biggest gimmick ever. I'm not gonna lie, though, if someone gave me an iPad, I would love it. Whenever I see anything that relates to the iPad, I will think of this:

"Make A Move"

This is what I have on repeat right now. THIS IS WHAT I WANT!! I do have to admit I stop playing it every once in a while to listen to some Erykah Badu but mostly this.

Candy is one of the co-hosts from my favorite Youtube show, SweetAddictionsTV, mmmhmmm. This song is the one used for the intro to their videos so I've been hooked on the first 30 seconds of it. Last week though, Candy's single "Make A Move" was released on iTunes (support your girl, only 99 cents!).

Hot beat, nice lyrics, most definitely a dance track and one of those songs that makes you just feel good! "Don't be scared", buy this, I promise you won't be disappointed.

April Fool's!!

Yesterday the internet was buzzing with pranks for April Fool's Day of course. Gmail was missing some vowels, Google announced it was changing it's name to Topeka, and a certain gossip blog (that rhymes with "them bee toe" had a few posts as pranks up.

OK so that last one wasn't true. I find it hard to take a lot of their posts serious that's why I threw that in there. Now that's not many but those are all of the ones I saw, except my favorite. Check it out below the jump!

Bieber Takes Over from Justin Bieber

At first I was like this is lame. Why is he trying to lower his voice, this kid sounds like a douchebag. Then he said he autographs lady lumps and I'm like OK JB got a little Nicki Minaj in him. But still not entertaining. THEN he did the joke about Chuck E. Cheese and said "Now who's old enough, BITCH?!" and I understood why girls cry over him and get all excited and all that good stuff.

Monkey Business

Earlier this month Animal Planet debuted a new series called Fatal Attractions. The topic of the show? Stupid people who think wild animals are pets. Not squirrels and raccoons. Lions. And Tigers. And too avoid any further cliches, bat shit crazy chimpanzees that leave you without a face.(That link is probably a little graphic.) Read more for my review of the show, and the stupidity of the individuals involved.


When I first saw commercials for this show, I knew that it was going to be good. There was no way that I was going to pass up this opportunity to see people doing stupid stuff with dangerous animals. (Animal Planet should have named this show Bad Judgement Hour.) I don't mean to make fun or belittle the suffering of these people, I'm writing to point out their ridiculous stupidity.

The first episode was about reptiles. The second episode was about Big Cats, and the third and most recent episode so far was about Chimpanzees. I only watched part of the reptile episode because it was kind of boring, but there was a man who had an obsession with lizards. And he had a good nine or 10 of them roaming his house. One day he stopped coming to work, and this is how they found him:


(Drawn by Da Vinci himself.)

The lizards ate his face off. And I'm not shocked. You had to see it coming. Everyone talking about you on the show did, anyway. Maybe they're just really in tune with the obvious. Or maybe they all called Cleo.

Then there was the southern bell from loony Looziana. This gentle spirit was attacked by her black jaguar, which grabbed her by the scalp.



When the police showed up to her house and shot the jaguar, it let her go. And when it let her go, her scalp was hanging over her face. And her exact words were "Oh, how embarrassing." That's where I lost it. I laughed so hard I can't even describe it.

I honestly don't see what it is that makes these people want deadly animals as pets. Especially when all their friends are smart enough to warn them of the dangers. If anything, I feel bad for the animals that have to die because they do what they live to do, hunt & kill. Overall I would give the show 4/4 stars. It's great, and I love hearing these incredibly ridiculous stories.

Fatal Attractions airs Sundays at 9pm Eastern and Pacific.

Massive Minaj Attack

Nicki Minaj's first official single Massive Attack featuring Sean Garrett has leaked. Head over to Good Fella Radio for more.

I was right

It's about sex. In my opinion, the song is dumb. But it's probably going to end up a huge radio hit or something. You can listen to it here on Christina's website.

Edit: As a follow up to last weeks post there was no confetti blasting from my speakers. And time did not slow down. You are now a stranger bitch, Mrs. Aguilera.

This Can't Be Life

Like, I don't get it. The whole Justin Bieber thing. I guess because I've gone through puberty and know good music.

Yeah I'm pretty sure that has something to do with it.

I log onto Youtube to see if there's any new videos from my subscriptions. No, but I see one of the featured videos. A three year old crying over none other than Justin Bieber. Like boo hoo-ing like she just got hit with a truck. She said because she "didn't get to see him today" and she wants him to be "one of the family".

At the end of the video I decided though that it was fake and was even more convinced that it might be fake when I saw the link to another video where the family got to meet Booger Bieber because he saw it.

I have to go. I must find a toddler to pretend to be mine and cry because she hasn't seen Kid Cudi today.

SMH...oh no...

Dear Usher,

I hope that this isn't for publicity, you know, with the CD coming out tomorrow and all. This would make everyone want to download it for free, I'm just saying.

Sincerely,
The writers at FPC

This Week In Music...

Just wanted to check in and let you all know what I'm interested in purchasing this week that way you know that you might (or might not, but I still love you) see a review for it in the future.

Now I have to bat my eyelashes at my BF and throw hints at him that I need an iTunes giftcard, lol. More after the jump!

• Alvin and the Chimpmunks: The Squeakquel: I wanted to see this when it came out in theatres but never got around to it. I enjoyed the first movie (don't judge me) and heard through the grapevine that this one was cute too. Plus I want to see the Chimpettes sing "Single Ladies".
• New Amerykah Pt. 2: Return of the Ankh: The only Erykah Badu I currently own is Baduizm and that's a shame cause I love her. I was just watching Dave Chappelle's Block Party last night and it reminded me that this CD was coming out. I like the single she has out now "Window Seat" and knew I had to get this when she on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
• Raymond v. Raymond: When I heard "Papers" I said "No Usher, try again." Then I heard "Hey Daddy" then "There Goes My Baby" then "Lil Freak" and decided I would give this one a try. His sixth studio album and critics are giving it good ratings so far, I'm looking forward to giving this one a listen.
  

Its the GaGa Way or the Highway

I guess everyone has been spending there past two and a half weeks coming up with their ideas for parodies of Lady GaGa's "Telephone" video because I'm starting to see a lot of them pop up. I know I've seen more than two of them but it's only two of them that I remember watching. The dude's version and the one featured here in this post. The dude's version was ok. It didn't exactly have me slapping me knee. Probably just made me smile a few times.


Then there's the version from Barely Digital, which made me laugh but still not knee slapping. Check it out after the jump.


This one features some look-a-likes playing GaGa and Honey B and for those of you who didn't really get the concept of the video at first *raises hand* you might like this one. In it, GaGa is explaining to Beyonce what she wants in her video and it doesn't sit well with Bey. But I don't think GaGa is gonna give her a choice...

You Got It In Her Hair

The Kids Choice Awards thing was on last night. I didn't watch but I did catch this little gem while I was hanging out with my friends. Katy Perry got slimed in the face. And she took it like a champ. When I first saw it I was like DAMN!

I'm not even playing when I say it looked like it hurt a lot. Video after the jump.

80's Music in 2010

I'm just gonna throw it out there, I love Goldfrapp's new album Head First. When I first heard that it was going to be an 80's style album, I was kind of worried because let's face it I don't really care about the 80's. But I only needed to listen to some of the songs once to fall in love. Read on for the rest of my review.



The track listing is as follows:
1. Rocket – 3:51
2. Believer – 3:43
3. Alive – 3:28
4. Dreaming – 5:07
5. Head First – 4:30
6. Hunt – 4:34
7. Shiny and Warm – 3:58
8. I Wanna Life – 4:13
9. Voicething – 4:44

My favorite tracks from the album are by far Dreaming, Hunt, and Voicething. The funny thing about Voicething is that there's no lyrics. It's like an instrumental but that's probably not the right word to describe it. Her voice is present throughout the song, but she's not saying anything as much as she's making noise like 'yup' and 'huh'.

Rocket, the lead single from the cd is so-so. I don't like it as much as I like the rest of the songs. It's still got that 80's vibe, but it just doesn't sit right with me.

Something interesting I noticed (or may be imagining), a few of the songs seem to share a common beat. I'm too lazy to name the songs, but it's like a slightly altered beat from Rocket hidden within the songs.

Reviews from people who are paid to review things say the album is around the 3/4 star area, and I agree. It has more ups than downs, and that's what makes this album great.

(I apologize for my crappy review. I have no idea what I am talking about.)

Iamamiwhoami; b

I really have no idea what is going on with this viral video campaign. I didn't have any idea before, but it's like I have less of one than I did before. The audio from last weeks video 'b' is on iTunes. Of course I bought it. You should too.

Monica "Still Standing" Review

Let me start by saying that I wouldn't actually consider myself a fan of Monica, but I do like her music and her voice is very beautiful. I still get excited when I hear "So Gone" come on! She totally and completely did her thing on that track. I'm starting to sound like a fan now, huh?

Before we get into this review let's rewind to 2006, before Soulja Boy and Bump-Its, the world was such a better place. This was the same year Monica released her previous album, The Makings of Me. Then it was on my iPod, now it's not even on my computer. Even looking at the album cover, you could tell it was a very different Monica than what we were used to. The tracks on that CD were somewhat a disappointment, I remember only liking a few of them. The rest you could tell she was trying to sound like what everyone else had out at the time. From then to now, Monica has done a full 180 360 180. It's different! Check out the full review below.

"Still Standing" is giving me all that I need right now. I'm trying to think of another R&B album by a female that I'm digging right now and nothing but this comes to mind. I didn't even listen to Alicia Keys' last album like that and I loves me some Alicia!

If you haven't heard "Everything to Me" from Monica yet, crawl from under that rock you've been under *cough*subscribetothisblog*cough* and get a life. This is just one of the few love songs on here. My favorites: "Superman", "Love All Over Me" and "Everything..." There's also the break-up songs, girl get over that sorry a...ahem: "Stay or Go", "Believing In Me". And then the kind of song that you listen to when you have your eye on someone special "If You Were My Man" (loooooove that track) and "Here I am". That pretty much covers the whole album except for a few songs.

I suggest though that you take a listen for yourself. I promise you will not be disappointed.

It's a wonder you still have any fans left

Come on son. It's a wonder you still have any fans left, Christina. You're being pretty low budget. No new material in years and then when you finally announce that you've got a new album coming out you keep pushing the date back? Postponing it every five minutes? What are you waiting for?


This album you're working on better be made of gold, and when I hear the first single confetti better blast out of my speakers and time should slow down (that line goes to Quinn). I'm not a fan but I am interested to see what you are going to do, considering the amount of time it's taking you to release an album. However by the looks of the cover it's going to be tacky and probably low budget.

And that countdown on your website? What was that about? I see it on Saturday, counting down to 12pm on Monday. Monday rolls around and it's now counting down to Tuesday at 12pm. Tuesday comes around and all we get is a song name (Not Myself Tonight), a single cover, and another countdown clock counting down to Wednesday. You could have at least released the single today. Like I said earlier, what are you waiting for?

My guess is that Not Myself Tonight is about sex. We'll find out soon...

Usher "Lil Freak"

While everybody else is putting Nicki Minaj on their single, Usher went and featured Cruella de Minaj for his second single from Raymond v. Raymond. How clever. Full review when we get the full video.

Say What Mariah?!

According to this source, Mariah Carey's Angels Advocate has been shelved. Originally planned to come out next week, it seems as if the album has been scrapped due to poor performance on Mariah's part. Or no one gives a shit. Like Miss Sidibe.




For those of you who didn't know, Angel's Advocate was an album consisting of remixes from the Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel and all the other crap that didn't make it on there the first time.

This Week In Music

Here's what to expect over the next few days:



Monday, March 22nd

Christina Aguilera has been stringing her fans along for years now (not including me). She hasn't released a new album in over 3 years, and finally we're starting to see some increased action from her. What's next? If this robo promotion and the countdown clock on her site are any indication, it looks like we're going to see something big from our this bionic chick tomorrow around 12pm. After the speculation over the last three months that Christina Aguilera was Iamamiwhoami, I can only hope that what she has planned is even more amazing than that. Otherwise... ouch.

Tuesday, March 23rd
Goldfrapp: Goldfrapp's long awaited 5th studio album Head First will be released internationally on the 22nd, and domestically (North America) on the 23rd. I've been waiting for this new album since Seventh Tree wrapped up, and I'm excited to hear some new music from Allison.

Justin Bieber: The latter half to his two-part debut album, My World 2.0, is set for release March 23, 2010. Includes his lead single, "Baby" feat. Ludacris.

Monica: Still Standing, the sixth studio album from R&B singer will be released on March 23rd. While I wouldn't actually consider myself a fan of Monica, I do like her music and am looking forward to the release of this album.

Doesn't look like there's much happening this week in terms of music.

More Iamamiwhoami

Iamamiwhoami has logged into youtube as of 52 minutes ago. As we all (I) know, Iamamiwhoami only logs into youtube to upload new videos. That's all for now. I'll leave you with her previous gem, uploaded last sunday.

No turkey unless it's a club sandwich: Sweet Little Nothings from Tiger Woods

Tiger woods should write a book. And that would be the perfect title. The hoe Tiger was messing around with put his text's online. Here they are, in their repulsive glory. (Featuring commentary by both Lucas & Quinn)


*(These are just some of the text messages)

Tiger:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/28/2009:
I want to be deep inside you

Tiger:Sent: 03:30 PM 08/29/2009:
Me to. I would wear you out

Tiger:Sent: 03:36 PM 08/29/2009:
After i cum you better start sucking my cock to get it hard

Tiger:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:
Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own

Tiger:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:
Then im going to tell you to shut the Fuck up while i slap your face and pull your hair for making noise

Tiger:Sent: 04:21 PM 08/29/2009:
Where do you want to be bitten

Tiger:Sent: 04:24 PM 08/29/2009:
Ok. Now your talking. Whatever i want. You are mine

Tiger:Sent: 12:35 PM 09/07/2009:
You just make sure you take care of me when you get here


Tiger:Sent: 07:12 PM 09/07/2009:
No turkey unless it's a club sandwich



Quinn: Yeah. That was the face I made about 19 messages into this mess. Not that the first 18 messages didn't shock me because they did. Tiger, Tiger, Tiger. Smh. You know if he's anything like Chris Brown and no one wants anything to do with him after his return to the golf world, he could always be a porn star. Or phone actor, or write/direct/produce adult films. I want to see the inbox messages because you know she was like, "This is your kitty Tiger, yeah, of course I've done it all you silly goose, haven't you seen my movies?" But I digress...

The way he was talking to this female! I really hope she had it in her head that she was the sideline hoe cause clearly that's the way he was talking to her. Talking about slapping her around and biting and pulling hair and shoving golf clubs up...oh...that wasn't in there? My bad. I love how he tries to be careful though. You can tell he was more devoted to keeping this a secret than making sure everything was spelled correctly. And the end where he was worried about how they might have gotten caught. Hilarious. Oh Tiger, you crack me up.



Lucas: I'll just let Judge Judy handle this because I'm at a loss for words. I never imagined Tiger Woods to be like this. But then again Tiger Woods rarely crosses my mind as Golf is boring and stupid. I have nothing more to say.

Alicia Sweetie, You Are Not GaGa...

I'm not gonna front, I loves me some Alicia Keys. I have all her music and she's one of the few singers with great acting skills (Beyonce, not so much). Give the lyrics, I'll name the song, I love Alicia Keys.

I'm going to get to the point but let me say first, this "set a date for your video premiere then keep pushing it back", who started this and why? I think it's pretty stupid. I don't like it, I can't think of anybody that likes it. Artists really need to step their game up. Now the first time that I was aware of these shenanigans was when the "Video Phone" video was coming out. I can't remember the date but at 5 p.m. EST they were gonna show it on MTV. Me and I'm pretty sure 100% of the gay population and I'll say just a small percentage of the rest of America tuned in at said time for disappointment. "Telephone" video, same thing. Before The Fame Monster was released I loved that song, had the ring tone and all. By the time I saw the video, my ring tone had changed like three times.

Alicia Keys' video for "Put It In a Love Song" feat. Beyonce was filmed last month. It has had three different release dates now. I read somewhere yesterday that it's still being edited and may not be released until mid-April (sorry, can't find the link).

Now I've said all of this to say that I believe Lady GaGa is a little more...I guess we could use the word...wanted? Sure both of them are successful internationally and both have Grammy's and yada yada yada but we can be patient (not really) waiting on GaGa's video. Alicia's, not so much.

So while we continue to wait because the video we supposed to premiere yesterday but I haven't seen it, you can enjoy the next best thing below the jump.




P.S. Y'all see those 20 million views "Telephone" has gotten in a week? Dayum.

I've Got...Some News For You

In our last post, Lucas (my light-skinned lover) introduced us to Robyn's new single, "Fembots Have Feelings Too". If you haven't heard it, go take a listen, I'll wait...


Catchy, right? If you're anything like me you are dancing in your seat right now. If you're anything like my sister, you are popping your booty right now. Most definitely a dance record. Funky beat, funny lyrics ("i got a lot of automatic booty applications"), and yeah fembots do have feelings too! Get it together!!

Did not know what to expect from this song or artist before I first heard it but now I'm anxious to hear the entire CD, Body Talk, when it's released. That all I have. Ta ta for now my loves.

Robyn Is A Fembot

Her new song, Fembot, from her upcoming album Body Talk.

A little late, I know, but True Life: I need a Transplant review.

This monday started a new season of MTV's documentary series True Life (which incidentally is like the only thing MTV is good for anymore). In this episode, a young man and a young woman both need transplants in order to survive.

Craig is a newlywed with Leukemia, and Morgan needs a new Kidney. The episode is one of these days most serious topics (really: "I'm under Peer Pressure" "I'm Graduating High School" "I Don't Fit In" "I'm Jealous". There's nothing special about any of those topics. Because I'm 99.9% sure everyone has been all of these things. Come on son.). I didn't cry or tear up during the episode but I did feel for the Craig and Morgan. Morgan was getting a kidney from her mom. I distinctly remember her saying that even though her sister has a better chance of a matching type kidney, she was going to get one from her mother because "was afraid of needles". Right. Bitch. Wait, that's not right. I'm not sure what I would say if a sibling asked me for an organ... After she got her transplant, she had to take pills twice a day for the rest of her life to keep the new kidney working. I was like WHAAAAT?!? IS U SERIOUS MORGAN?!? Morgan was surprisingly calm and optimistic for someone about to be sliced open, organs ripped out, and another one jammed in there.

But that's just a kidney. Extracting bone marrow? Yikes. Long story short they jam a needle in your hip bone and suck out the red stuff on the inside. Craig's brother was the one to donate the bone marrow to him. After the procedure was over Craig and his wife and mom were just sitting in his hospital room and I started to wonder how a parent must feel when their child gets sick or is born sick? I hate kids. I will never know. This reminds me of that book My Sisters Keeper. Well, everything except for the brother being born just to keep the other one alive. That is messed up. Well I can gladly say that both Morgan and Craig lived. Craig's white blood cell count went up. Morgan's kidney was working pretty fine and she moved out of her parents house and went to college. The last thing I remember in the episode that I really care to talk about was when Craig was getting the medicine he needed injected into his heart. He said that he could taste the meds even though they went straight into his mouth. What.

Kid's Choice Awards 2010

This morning I woke up to Mighty B on my TV. If you're not familiar with that it's a cartoon on Nickelodeon. (Don't judge me, bro.) A commercial comes on for the Kid's Choice Awards 2010 and it's one i haven't seen before. I believe the only other one I've seen is with Adam Sandler and Kevin James. This new one however, informed us that there would be live performances by Rihanna and Justin Bieber. Now the latter I totally understand. This kid just like fell out of the sky into tween girls' hearts all over the world. It is very seldom that you do not see his name as a trending topic on Twitter and I won't even lie, after the first time I heard "One Time" I went and added it to my iPod. But this isn't about Justin Bieber.

This is about Rihanna and her live performance. Now this is for the Kid's Choice Awards on Nickelodeon. Rihanna's latest album was Rated R and her latest single is "Rude Boy". What song is she gonna perform in front of these kids?

Her singles have been:

• "Russian Roulette" which I think may be too depressing to perform

• "Hard" if she does perform this one I hope she has already learned substitute words for the choice words in the song

• "Rude Boy" yeah, we so do not need little teeny boppers singing to their Justin Bieber posters asking if he's big enough

Now I did not mention "Wait Your Turn" simply because I really don't consider it a single. I never even heard it on the radio, but i digress. Let's say though that she performs another one of her songs from Rated R, it's still too much for the kids!! But, after I scratch my head a few times and really think about it, I can't think of anyone else they could get to perform. Jonas Brothers? Miley Cyrus? Is that allowed since they're both Disney?

To Whom It May Concern

For the past three months I have been captivated with a series of viral videos on Youtube. User Iamamiwhoami has (since early December) been uploading a series of short viral videos featuring a dirty, large eyed blonde female. What are the videos about? Your guess is as good as mine, but they keep getting better and better. For quite a while now, forums on the internet have been busy with threads speculating as to who was behind the videos (myself included). I've been lurking a few sites, and for a while now I've been almost entirely certain that it's Christina Aguilera. I'm not a fan, but at least it's someone I've heard of.

Well that was all until this weeks brand new video. This video, uploaded Sunday night is four minutes long. In it, the woman is wrapped entirely in plastic that puts me in mind of a burn victim. Do I still think it's Christina? Not so much. I'm leaning more toward Jonna Lee. Why? She's apparently been posting images on her Twitter that appear to be the set of some of the Iamamiwhoami videos. I’m short on time for now. Expect more later.

On My iPod...

Seems like every week I have a different song that I'm constantly listening to. Last week it was Usher's "There Goes My Baby" and before that it was B.o.B. feat. Bruno Mars "Nothing On You" (which happens to be MTV Jam's Jam of the week). Anywho, it's not something I do on purpose, it just...happens. I'm always looking for what's new and what's hot on the music scene and most times I find something really good and I can't stop listening to it.

This week, its Aloe Blacc "I Need A Dollar". If you're like me and Sunday nights at around 9:55 pm you're making sure there's nothing you have to leave the room for so you can be ready to watch "How to Make It In America", then you've heard the song. It's so catchy. I watched a few episodes OnDemand and seeing it back-to-back had the song in my head all day. I'm not exactly sure what to call this sound though. It could fit into the soul genre and it sounds "old" (a term I'm using loosely) but nothing like The Temptations would sing. Get it?

No hidden meaning here (that I'm aware of), it's simply about needing to make some money. It fits the show perfectly, which deserves a post of it's own. And I can relate to it because if there's anything i need right about now it's a dollar! Makes me wish I had a hustle...